Wisdom From the Good Doctor...

Dr. Seuss has always been big in our house...

Helloooo my fellow traveler...  How I have missed all of my fellow Pilgrims. Let's get the big stuff out of the way. I'm here, my health is good, my Beauties are good; Ian graduated from 6th grade, Jeff is still the love of my life.  I have been too busy and that has kept me away from all of you. I thought this post would be a tad different... Hope it resonates. xo

I wasn't a Dr. Seuss fan as a child... It just wasn't the books of my childhood.  My fist real exposure to the Seuss was sitting on the floor of a Barnes and Noble with Jeff in California, four months after we started dating. We had flown out the day after Christmas and I was meeting (for the first time) the entire Ferguson family. We had gone into the Barnes and Noble to pick up books as Christmas gifts for his baby niece (now a lawyer) and nephew (who is working on becoming fluent in Japanese--for funzies!). Want to learn about your new boyfriend ladies?, go to the children's section of a bookstore. Jeff was insistent that the children were each getting a selection of Dr. Seuss books. So there we sat and Jeff read the stories that I had missed from my childhood. I on the other hand pulled out my favorite childhood book; "The Giving Tree".

Jeff of course had never read it--all the other Shel Silverstein books; but not that one. So there we sat; as I began to read my book; you guessed it, I began to ugly cry. Bad blue-eye liner ran down my face. Oh Lord, save us from the early 90's.

Both authors have remained integral parts of our married life. Dr. Seuss is quoted as much as world figures, saints and the lessons of the Giving Tree are evident in my marriage; so much so that Jeff proposed to me by reading me the Giving Tree before he presented me with my "sparkle" or engagement ring.

We have had so many Seuss books to call favorites, maybe because we read them so many times to the children. Or maybe just because the message is so clear. One of the most common graduation gifts is Dr. Seuss'; "Oh the Places you will Go" and it certainly holds up in my top 10 list. I realized that I have needed to pull many of the theme and quotes lately. We use the words from the book as mini-mantras in our home. The quotes seem to encapsulate where I find myself today.

This quote has helped me as I touched my toe back into the working world:

"You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...” ― Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You'll Go!

I do have brains in my head and I do have very cute shoes, which has made it ever so easy to tip-toe back into the working world.  In returning to the working world; I didn't realizes that having children has made me more confident then I ever realized. I think motherhood has made me at my core, critically aware of my strengths and weakness. You develop a real understanding of what you are--perhaps we all become titanium. I know who I am; I know what I need, I know where I want to go...

I also have learned when to identify my non-negotiables. I know for example, I can't sew a costume, but I'm amazing at ordering through Amazon.  I can cook an amazing, dinner but sometimes take-out is a better choice. Prioritize. Strengths and weaknesses. That has been such a gift that I didn't have about myself in my 20's... I now know my strengths, I now understand how to play to them. Returning to the workforce has also provided me with a better pair of glasses to see when things are not about me (at all), or when they are and how to know the difference.

Those skills have helped me work on my balance. But even with the best skills and paying good attention to my abilities and health and family; we can still stumble. Which is why it has occurred to me that recently I have stumbled into a slump.

"When you're in a Slump, you're not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.” 

“You'll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You'll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life's a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left.” ― Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You'll Go!

While I have been working on my balancing and foot work, it has taken me away from all of you.

Balance, it often seems is the hardest skill to master...

The beauty and the difficult aspect of balance is it always changes. What works this week; may not the next. I have found that it is something that I constantly need to work on and rework.

I have also challenged myself to stop looking at the quantity of my work and take a better look at the quality of what I give of myself and look for in others. I for some reason have not recognized that everything I touch, every part of me is important. I use that trusty red pen to provide a failing grade on myself, because I don't value my contributions. I'm not a brain surgeon, a pilot, lawyer, or chemist... yet I look at these individuals and question my worth. That, what I contribute in the world isn't enough. And it is with that negativity about myself that I look to an amazing young woman and Saint/Doctor of the church St. Theresa the Little Flower

"When one loves, one does not calculate.” ― Thérèse de Lisieux

And there it is...      I'm calculating,     I'm questioning.      I'm fighting with myself.

I'm slumping because I haven't let my faith drive me. I'm once again, trying to wrestle for a false sense of control. For an understanding of this world that is fruitless. I have lost my vision to see that I need to be focusing on a deepening of my prayer life, a greater union with the Divine.

In an effort for that connection, I found the medicine that I need. I have been attending daily mass. For me the connection to the Divine is strengthened in the mass. In the 30 minutes daily where I meet Christ in his most human and Divine form. It is through that gift that I have shaken off the slump and met myself.

And will you succeed?

Yes! You will, indeed!

(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)” 

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...

be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray

or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,

you're off to Great Places!

Today is your day!

Your mountain is waiting.

So...get on your way!” ― Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You'll Go!

May you find the Divine in your journey and stay away from the hidden slumps of this world.

Your mountain is waiting...

The Divine in me bows to the Divine in you.

Kathryn

PilgrimageGal

Photo credit: PilgrimageGal

This is the 4th anniversary of my first blog post.  On this day especially, I want to thank you for walking with me.

New Year and Spiritual Retreats...

My walk on a rare cloudy day...

Happy New Year my follow Pilgrims.

I hope your holidays were filled with the light and love that only comes from the warmth of the Divine. I have had a beautiful season. My mother was visiting from December 16 to January 16. We celebrated Christmas, New Year and her youngest grandchild's 10th birthday. It's hard to believe that my baby is 10.

So after saying goodbye to my mom and trying to locate and pack away the last of the errant Christmas decorations, I finally cleared my schedule for a few minutes alone with all of you. I have so many things to share about my plans for this year; but for now I thought I would share some details of the inner workings of my daily faith life.

I don't know about you; but there have been times when I thought I was doing this prayer thing all wrong. Honestly, I don't meditate everyday, don't sit down with Scripture for even a few minutes most days. I admit sometimes I choose sleep over prayer, or coffee with a girlfriend or even just to watch something mind-numbing streaming on my screen.  So the question becomes, how do you stay connected with the Divine when so much noise and distractions are surrounding your daily journey?

First, we need to re-frame what most of us consider time with the Divine. I'm not sure why, but many of us have grown-up believing that prayer time needs to be in a house of worship. While that can be a beautiful place to pray and for some among us, it centers us quickly, it's not always the best place. For many of us with Beauties, going to a service for years was part wrestling match, part hairy eye balls; washed down with many threats. A wonderful way to meet the face of the Creator.

Just this past Sunday; my family of four was so irritated with one another I replied while getting ready for church:  "We all need to talk to Jesus, because I don't have anything nice to say to any of you right now."

We then spent the 10 minute drive to Mass flicking and bickering with each other.  Mass was an hour where we couldn't talk to each other--which was a gift.  I'm happy to report that we were all smiling well before communion. I take great comfort in knowing, I'm not alone in having a bad day with my Beauties.

Which gets me back to your prayer life. Sometimes I'm distracted. So creating the space where I can be open to hearing the voice of the Divine can be tricky.

One of the best things about the move has been my ability to spend time outside year around. Before the move, I literately spent months inside in bed; too sick to move. The more temperate climate has changed my life. Within my neighborhood is a protected wild life preserve, Jeffrey created a simple walk for me that is a couple of miles. It's an easy walk, but filled with such beauty, mountain views, a small lake, birds and plants I have never seen. The walk brings me peace for which I had been searching--this special place is my Spiritual retreat.  I leave everyone and go for a lovely walk meeting the Divine in every view.

What makes this walk a retreat is my smartphone. Crazy as it sounds, it's an integral part of my walk. From the music I play, to the meditations, or even the podcasts by religious thinkers. My i-phone connects me to the Divine on this walk.

Many of us aren't smartphone savvy; I admit I'm not the best on my i-Phone; but it's easy to find great tools on the App Store.  One of my favorite apps is "On Being with Krista Tippet", which includes podcasts of Krista interviewing speakers that I love like Fr. Richard Rohr, Fr. James Martin and others.  Or I simply download some Gregorian Chants to help me meditate on my walk. Each of these offer me an escape. Each offer me a beautiful walk with a friend. Here is the best part, most of the podcasts are free! If you are looking for a new way to change your prayer life, look no further than to technology to connect you with voices you need to hear.  I also like that it's a two-fer, I'm getting sunshine, fresh air and building my prayer life.

So consider it my New Year's Gift to you... Enhancing your prayer life is as easy as a walk and a listen.

Till we catch up on the trail again. All my love my Pilgrims

Xo

Kathryn

The Pilgrimage Gal

The Lessons of our Pilgrimage...

I have always wanted to be that girl who traveled the world, to visit the holy sites of the major faiths. For twenty years I have longed to walk the "El Camino de Santiago" in Spain. In English it is known as the "Way of St. James". A holy pilgrimage that dates back to the Middle Ages where thousands walk through Spain to the Cathedral Santiago de Compostela.

Pilgrims walk on multiple routes to the cathedral. Along the way they pass through villages and stay in small hotels or inns. They travel in groups or alone looking for spiritual enlightenment. When on a pilgrimage you may travel for many different reasons, but at the end you are looking for answers, enlightenment and peace.

Along the Camino, pilgrims have taken to wearing or carrying scallop shells. The tradition of the shell dates back to the legend of St. James the Apostle. There are several stories that involve St. James and the scallop shell that have become part of the tradition. One is, that the grooves in the shell, which come together at a single point, represent the various routes pilgrims traveled, all ending at the same destination. The journey is epic, filled with mountain views and concludes with ocean vistas. You crisscross through towns and villages along the way, meeting new friends and also have time for self-reflection and exploration.

I loved the idea that you walk and meet fellow pilgrims and at the end of the day you find yourself in a small village drinking wine and making relationships to support you on this magnificent journey. You could make life long friendships. Imagine ancient villages with Spain's beautiful topography, the comfort of a meal, resting your tired feet, and knowing you were walking the same path that St. James had walked thousands of years before.

At the end, pilgrims discuss the physical and emotional challenges they encountered and overcame along the way. Many offering tales of life affirming and spiritual change.

I wanted to take that transformative journey.

But, I lacked two things, the financial ability to go for two months and more honestly, I don't have the physical strength to tackle such a journey. I don't have a nanny, a driver, a house manager, and I don't have a private jet. Listen if you do, God bless you, please invite me on vacation. I mean a private jet...seriously let's go! Don't get me wrong, I'm a girl with first world problems; honestly, I'm a princess and I know it.

This is a journey that wasn't going to happen for me.

I made peace with that revelation.

I realized that if I wanted that transformative experience, I was going to have to create my own. I would create my journey, listen to the pilgrims at the quiet rest stops the Divine put on my path. My path would not be in Spain, it would be in the coffee shops in my own town, the people I meet when I do public speaking, and the individuals I meet on my daily journey through this life of mine.

I would share the lessons learned openly and honestly. With the hope that my fellow Pilgrims would do the same. We would share this journey, the truth and our encounters with the Divine.

That my fellow Pilgrims is how PilgrimageGal was born. And in that process, I would create my own transformative journey.

I have always been transparent when the blog first began; I was worried about my mortality, that I wouldn't live to see my Beauties grow into adulthood. The blog was and is for them, but it's more than just a record, it's a journal of my life lessons as I transform. I won't lie and say those thoughts of my mortality don't still cross my mind deep in the darkness of night; but it's not my focus. My focus remains learning, growing in my faith and running down the path to see what the next mile marker will teach me about love. It is in that transformation that all of my fellow

Pilgrims

(that's you) help me grow and deepen the lessons of this journey.

The beauty of transformation is that you have no idea how you will be on the other side. That is why this journey is so meaningful, I'm learning in real time. Sure there are many things I know for-sure and I share them. But more than that, I lean that each mile marker my faith strengthens, my love expands, and I'm growing to love more deeply that person that I see in the mirror. That expanding love, makes me a better mom, lover, friend and better Kathryn walking in the world.

We all have struggles. Sometimes it's your broken down jet, other times it's laundry, crazy bosses, relationship issues, parenting troubles, your ex, money worries, dealing with doctors, stupid insurance companies and raising loving and healthy children. I don't know too many of us who have the luxury and I mean luxury to drop out of our daily life to achieve this transformation. That is why PilgrimageGal is here. We are on this sacred pilgrimage together, we bring our problems, our joys, our successes and failures on the journey. We do all of this while caring for our aging parents, our children, while we carpool, work and make Wednesday night dinner. 

We are

Pilgrims

in the trenches! We are familiar with the messy and the foolishness of life. That is why we are walking and laughing together, sharing our truth, our love and light, and waiting for the next mile marker for a bite to eat, a delicious glass of wine, and some time for reflection.

That is what I'm offering to you... So lace up your shoes and meet me here. When your life leads you to a mile marker on your journey. We will sort it out together and keep moving forward.

I've gotta run, the laundry basket is overflowing... 

Till we meet again.

Namaste... The Divine in me bows and honors the Divine in you always.

Much love always,

Kathryn the PilgrimageGal

PS. I love to hear from you, so don't hesitate to send me a note with an update of your journey.  You can leave a comment, or friend me on

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 or send me an email using the form on the right. Only my eyes will see the email, so please reach out and share your truth. I will do my best to get back in touch. 

photo credit:

Scallop Shell

via

photopin

(license)